Breakfast of Champions

Do any of you know what a spider tastes like? I’m not too sure either. I woke up this morning with a foul taste in my mouth. I can’t describe it, because nothing has ever tasted this bad to me before. If I had to guess I would say it tastes like a thousand dead bugs. That was the first thing that popped into my head this morning. Working from that thought I came to the conclusion that the only thing that would taste like that many bugs would have to be something small enough to fit in my mouth and either eat bugs or shake hands with a lot of bugs.

Unless a silver fish or millipede was running for President of my room and had been out kissing bug babies or shaking old bugs hands trying to garner support. I would have to think it was a spider. Judging from the amount of flavor I would guess it was one of those big bummed spiders that hangs from webs. Not one of those athletic running around types. That is just my luck. I eat the fat lazy slob of the bug world in my sleep.
That is not my favorite way to wake up. On the plus side being that grossed out at ten to seven will make me jump out of bed and run for the washroom. I was twenty minutes early for work today. I haven’t been that early for anything since that day I though they were giving away free. Come to think of it, I’ve never been that early for anything. Ever.